I wannas sexs uuuuu
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
