when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
