Walk of Shame. In a state park.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
