is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Randomize
