your parents love me but you hate me
My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
