I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
