Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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