I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
