we have officially lost it.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
