Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
