problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
