that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
