is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
