My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
