She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize