I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Randomize
