Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize