I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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