If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We don't watch enough power rangers
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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