In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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