can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
