what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
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