if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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