He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize