And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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