I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Randomize
