it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
