I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
