an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize