What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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