Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
