this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
