I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
