i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
