a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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