some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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