rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
