WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
