addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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