One girl and one boy is just not enough.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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