I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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