this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize