I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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