biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
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