O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
