Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
