I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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