I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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