I'm pants shitting drunk right now
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
