I will die if light touches me.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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