everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
